Sunday, December 31, 2017

Pictures Of Women

I would like to preface by saying that the Torah was not given to angels [actually - the gemara says that. I plagarized:-)]. We are human beings and not expected to exceed our human limitations. If at times we slip - then we do teshuva and our slips are transformed into mitzvos. Hashem loves us and is not looking for us to sin. The foundation of any avodas Hashem is mental health and stability. I don't want anything I ever write to make anyone excessively nervous or tense. We do our best with simcha and serenity. 

That being said....

It is Shovevim time and that behooves us to discuss inyanei kedusha

There is a lot of backlash on the Internet against those religious publications that refuse to publish pictures of women. HOW DEMEANING!!!

Why is it demeaning? Why is it wrong? Because the bloggers say so. 

OK. But what does the HALACHA say?? What do Chazal say? Ask these writers and they either don't know or don't care. 

Rabbeinu Yonah, a very prominent rishon, writes in his אגרת התשובה: 

אסור לאדם להסתכל באשת איש מן התורה שנאמר ולא תתורו אחרי לבבכם ואחרי עיניכם.

It is forbidden to gaze at a married women according to Torah law as it says "don't stray after your hearts and eyes".

He doesn't write that one is not allowed to look in a lustful way [as others understand and we will hopefully get to them and as he himself writes when he forbids touching] but that one is not allowed to look at all. [His ruling is based on the gemara in Brachos 12].

The gemara in Avoda Zara [20b] says:

"מעשה ברבן שמעון בן גמליאל שהיה על גבי מעלה בהר הבית, וראה עובדת כוכבים אחת נאה ביותר, אמר: מה רבו מעשיך ה'!ואף רבי עקיבא ראה אשת טורנוסרופוס הרשע...
ולאסתכולי מי שרי? מיתיבי: ונשמרת מכל דבר רע - שלא יסתכל אדם באשה נאה ואפילו פנויה, באשת איש ואפילו מכוערת, ולא בבגדי צבע של אשה...
קרן זוית הואי".


In short, the gemara relates that Rav Shimon Ben Gamliel and Rebbi Akiva saw women. The gemara asks HOW IS IT PERMITTED TO LOOK AT A WOMAN??? The gemara says that one may not even look at the attractive clothing of a woman!! 

The gemara should have answered that they had no lustful intentions because they were holy people, so it was OK.. But no - the gemara answers that she walked around the corner and it was TOTALLY unexpected, so it wasn't their fault. 

From this gemara it seems to emerge quite clearly that one may not gaze at a women. [I write "gaze" because many poskim, such as the Rogochover, make a distinction between looking for a moment (ראייה) which may be permitted and gazing intently (הסתכלות) which is not]. ולאיסתכולי מי שרי? - Is it permitted to look?? The gemara asks rhetorically. 

So how can one print pictures of women when men are not allowed to gaze at them?? The fact that it was done in the past is not a justification. And frankly - many women are not offended. Many women don't WANT their pictures printed. Many are happy that their husbands are not looking at other women. It is not intended to offend women. Why would the publishers offend 50 percent of their potential readers? Not wise.

It all depends on your narrative. The feminist narrative is that the Torah, and the men who propound it, are out to oppress women. 

BUT THEY AREN'T. 

Their "agenda" is [among other things] to create a holy world. 

When one goes to the so-called "kiruv" websites, one who understands these matters gets the sense that while they are being mekarev some, they are being meracheik [distancing] others when they print pictures of young, very attractive women. Did they ask a gadol if it is permitted? Hard to believe that they did.    

When a "beauty queen" like Miss Israel does or says something Jewish, they not only cover the story but make sure to feature a picture of her [I don't look but I see out of the corner of my eye that there is a picture]. WHY? It is shameful. Do they expect men not to have lustful thoughts [which is universally forbidden according to ALL opinions] when seeing a woman who was crowned the most beautiful woman in the country? Do they care??  

They certainly don't care what I say or even read this blog. They get far more hits than I do. They make a living off their websites. I don't [despite my consistent request on the side of the page to help support the site and the proliferation of Torah which is ignored]. But there is din vi-cheshbon and they will have to answer to Hashem for all of the men they were מכשיל. 

So if you are walking down the street you are allowed to watch where you are going. You must look up when crossing the street or driving. You are bound to see women. But ideally? Ideally, one should never look at a woman other than his grandmother, mother, wife and daughters. So when reading a newspaper of magazine that avoids pictures of women, one is able to live the ideal [not that reading a magazine is the ideal but that is another story].  

If you work and have to look at a woman then you do it - but as minimally as possible. This is undisputed. ALL Jewish sources agree that the less contact between the sexes, the better. 

The reason is simple - we are sexual beings with an active nefesh habehemis. Our holy souls are put on mute when encountering attractive women. If we are completely unaffected then it could just be that we have been desensitized to a women's sexuality and to our own. 

I don't think that that is a particularly positive development. 

There is MUCH more to say, both on a halachic, philosophical and psychological level. Hopefully in the near future....

In the meantime - a freilichin Shovevim.  

I just want to conclude by reminding ourselves that people writing opinion pieces on the Internet are often ignorant of Torah and apathetic to it's core goals and teachings. If you are in the Torah camp, it is critical to gain the traditional perspective on issues.  

That is what I try to provide. If you think that I am wrong then I would LOVE to hear from you.