Monday, October 29, 2012

Raising Good Children

There is a video that is being circulated about Israeli Religious Zionist Rabbis whose daughters are no longer religious. I couldn't watch the video because the young ladies weren't dressed and the Shulchan Aruch forbids me from looking but it made me think....

These Rabbis are good people. They tried their best. Their wives were role models of tzniyus and purity. Yet, their daughters rebelled and live contrary to their parents value system despite the pain it surely causes the parents. It would be easy to just blame the parents and say that if they would have been better then they would not have such children but I don't think that it is so simple.

I know kids who grew up in homes where they had terrible role models such as unmonitored Internet viewing, DVD's of all types, derelict friends and parents who were vehemently opposed to the heightened religious sensitivities personified by their children. Yet, these kids grew up to be spiritual giants. I know other kids who grew up in homes where it was כולו תורה, the father was involved in full time learning, the mother wore a tichel down to her knees, the child was sent to the most religious schools and yet they fell far short of expectations.

My conclusion is NOT that it doesn't matter how you raise your child. Of course one should try to spiritually nourish the child as much as he can. But at the end of the day we cannot choose for our children.

We can only daven hard that they choose the right path. When we are finished davening hard there is only one thing left to do.    

Daven harder.